Goodbye Summer, Hello Fall

Happy Fall! It has been way too long since I have been around the blogging world and once again for the same reasons....LIFE.  I realized today that summer is over and fall is here and I ask myself, "where did it go?".... What have we been up to this summer? To be honest, this summer was a hard one for me.  I love to fill my summer with lots of activities that are focused on water and/or sand. I love to have my toes in the sand, soaking up lots of sun rays. Well, I barely made a dent on my summer bucket list.... For the most part, I was what you call a hermit.  It is exhausting getting 3 littles out of the house; add in sand, bathing suits, clothes, food etc....and I would be on my death bed when we got home.  We made the best of it though and I just kept reminding myself that there will be plenty more summers when the kids are older and we are able to do more, and not to wish this time away.

We started off the summer getting family pictures taken since we keep having kids and our pictures are outdated.  Getting pictures of 3 boys five and under is quite a chore...let me just tell you...Children/family photographers are saints!

 

Photographer: Sarah Rogers with Sully and Willis Photography

Since we took the boys to Disney World over Easter break, we decided to not go on a summer vacation this year. We did however go on a mini vacation to visit our family in GA, for the 4th of July. We also visited the Atlanta Aquarium while we were there.

Cousins

The boys enjoyed swimming almost everyday and Zachary learned how to swim this summer and Lukas wasn't far behind.

No, Lukas can't swim alone..he has a bubble on his back

Lukas is finally potty trained (woo hoo), and I am loving this 1 less in diapers thing. We got Zachary into modeling, which he loves to do since he is a total ham. 

My lil Gap model

Love this cutie

Gavin got his first haircut at 7 months old. This is a record since the other boys were way over one years old before a first haircut. When you have to put your child's hair in a ponytail for him to be able to see....its time!

He started physical therapy and occupational therapy... so with those two and seeing his early interventionist we have a total of 3 therapy sessions a week! He is doing great at sitting up but he still not crawling. He just rolls like crazy to get where he wants to go.  I know they say, "he will do it when he is ready", but it's still very frustrating to see the months pass by and your baby not doing what others his age are. This is a constant battle with me but I try to look at the bigger picture. He will stand....if you put him into that position, but hey! I am going to celebrate any accomplishment.

Look at me!

He is still a chunker and is gaining weight like crazy. He's in the 50 percentile on a typical chart. Still 100% nursing and will not drink from a bottle which makes for a very tired mama! This is a huge goal that we are working towards with OT. We are not trying for a bottle anymore though because he is almost 10 months and soon he will need to drink from a cup. He is a little slower on eating food and has a hard time swallowing it.... but still working so hard and getting better everyday. His OT brought us a new spoon to try and viola! Who would have thought... The spoon was all it took for him to start eating/swallowing better.

This is a Maroon Spoon from The Equipment Shop

 We are so proud of our little G... He is such an outgoing, lovable, little social butterfly, who loves attention.

Eating his puffs

This summer, Curtis and I decided to start some DIY projects... this was our way of spending quality time together and also would benefit me on the side (lol).  So we decided to build our very own rustic farmhouse table. After several mistakes, a few bad arguments and very close to a separation, we finished this beautiful table!  

I was shocked at how good it actually turned out. The finish took me forever since I am so indecisive, but I am so pleased with it.  I will be posting here soon, an entire page about the table and what we did, for all of you who would like to know.

My baby is in kindergarten :(

School started a few weeks ago and my sweet Zachary started kindergarten....he loves it, except for the getting up at 6:30am part. As much as I like the break, I miss him like crazy.  When I went to kindergarten, we went for a half day. He is gone from 7-3! This is something I am going to have to get use to.

Lukas started going to preschool again two mornings a week and verdict is still out on if he likes it or not.  With two year olds...one day they like something and the next they hate it. So Gavin and I have some time alone those two mornings.

This past weekend we had Gavin dedicated over in GA with out family. My mom and dad came from NJ so that my dad could do the dedication which was really nice.  Its hard doing life without any family close by so we jumped at the opportunity to have most of us together.  We are so grateful for our family and friends that were able to be there with us.

My daddy, praying over Gavin

We had the dedication at a park in the woods

New "Diet"

The newest thing that our family has started is a new, healthy, clean way of eating.  We have always eaten fairly healthy but some medical concerns and conditions that Gavin may have in the future has turned me turn into a researching food freak.  Apparently children with Down syndrome have a harder time eating and digesting certain foods, than some would.  Those certain foods are in our everyday diet.  A lot of health conditions can be helped or even resolved just from changing what you put into your body.  Before he understands that I am feeding him something different than the rest of us, I need to change the way I eat and slowly incorporate it into our everyday meals.   I will talk more about this later in another post and go into it a bit further but at this current time we are going to be doing a detox....detoxing from processed foods and sugar.  Sugar is a hard thing to give up here at the house. It's seriously like crack and this was probably the worst time to eliminate it (Halloween right after the corner).   I will be putting Gavin on the GAPS diet once he gets better at eating. This diet is pretty crazy and strict but I want to help him in any way that I can, and this seems to be what has helped a lot of kids with DS.  I hate calling it a "diet" because we won't actually be dieting...we will be changing our way of life.  If you are interested in finding out more, or would like some yummy whole food recipes, be on the lookout for my next post.

Brothers being silly

This is our last time eating at Five Guys :(

Gavin loves his brothers

Well, that's it for now....I hope you all had a fabulous summer, and enjoy the cooler weather coming in. 

CONTENTMENT

There's that saying, "the grass is always greener on the other side".  Well I want to know...Is the grass always greener on the other side? When will MY grass be green on MY side? I find myself constantly sounding like a 3 year old- "I want this, I want that, I want I want I want".  I know I sound ridiculous, but will I ever be content with what I have?

We as mothers tend to be very hard on ourselves.  We as women in general tend to be hard on ourselves.
We want to be skinnier
We want to be taller
We want to be prettier
We want to be better at everything
We want an awesome career
We want to be married to prince charming and have well-behaved kids
We want to be the worlds best mom
We want to be the worlds craftiest mom
We want to be a organized, and keep a clean house, and be an amazing cook, and the list goes on and on....


For awhile I was blaming it on social media- Facebook, Pinterest, etc..or just the fact that this is how we are wired. We are women, and we do A LOT of comparing.  If you don't do A, B, or C, like Mrs. Jones, then you are not a good mom. Well, we need to cut ourselves a break. Just because we throw an awesome birthday party, or cook our family a 4 course gourmet meal, or keep our house spotless and organized does not make a world class mom. All you need is LOVE :) But lets be real.... I can tell myself this all day long, and by the next day I am back to re-decorating my house, or coming up with a new idea for my backyard oasis.

 Priorities change, and mine change a lot faster than others.  A word I need to install in my vocabulary is CONTENTMENT.  I know what the Bible says on this and one of my favorite verses is Matthew 6:33 - But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
This is a lot easier said then done.  Maybe my "wants" run a lot deeper than just comparison.  I ran across a quote the other day that really hit me.  Maybe I am constantly trying to keep myself busy with projects and buying material things because I am trying to fill a void or this emptiness I feel inside.  The quote is by Florence Welch- "When you are heartbroken, you are at your most creative- you have to channel all your energies into something else to not think about it."

When you're heartbroken, you're at your most creative - you have to channel all your energies into something else to not think about it.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/contentment.html#KVBtSVHUctsUgX5l.99

I wouldn't say I am heartbroken, but my heart does still heart.  I am crazy in love with my lol G-man and I don't want to change or replace him ever..... but will I ever be content with not having that baby that I "lost"? The one that I daydreamed about for 9 months?  Could this be what I am trying to fill? We were sure that we were done having children after Lukas, but obviously that wasn't Gods plan, so after another positive pregnancy test,  I hounded Curtis for awhile about getting snipped.   Well fast forward 9 months...no for real THE DAY before Gavin was born, Curtis lost his manhood.. just kidding..it wasn't that bad.  So.... now that we cannot have anymore children, I decide that I MAY WANT more! Why?!!!  Is it because I want what I can't have? Or are these feelings somehow trying to replace that baby I didn't have? If Gavin didn't have Down syndrome, would I still want more? I don't know!!!!!

 I like to always end on a positive note, showing that I have learned something from my thoughts and words and I am a better person for it. I want to be able to share right now that I AM FINALLY CONTENT WHERE I AM! But I can't seem to do that right now.   I am still working through a lot of things, and that's OK. It doesn't mean that I am ungrateful for what I have, because I am extremely thankful for everything that I have been blessed with...

The one thing I am sure of, is that I love my children. God blessed me with 3 awesome children, but especially with Gavin, for reasons I may not know or understand right now.  I need to try my best and keep working towards being content.  I need to start living life with the children I do have, and stop worrying about the ones I don't, and may never have. I will get there.

Update

Its been a little while since I have given an update on Gavin.  He is now 6 1/2 months and seems to be doing great! We've had a ton of doctor appointments and therapies over the last week.

At his 6 month well baby check he weighed in at 18lbs, and 26 inches.  He is approximately in the 50%, which his pediatrician said is great. They usually go by a different weight and height chart in children with Down syndrome.


 He is progressing in his physical therapy and getting a little stronger everyday.  He has been sitting by himself for a short time but was reminded that hes actually only "propping" himself with his arms like a tripod. OH WELL! in my book, he is still sitting by himself.. and we are going to continue to praise him for the things that other people take for granted.  Before I know it he will be crawling so I am ok with him taking his time on reaching some of these goals.

At his ENT appointment, I was once again annoyed because I feel like I constantly get the run around there. No one seems to know anything and I see a different doctor or PA every time I go. They do a ton of different hearing tests but never know anything. Every time it comes back "inconclusive" So why am I going at this moment in time???? After voicing my concern, the doctor suggested we put him under anesthesia and clean out any build up in his extra narrow ear canals.  They cannot do this while he is awake because for one it will severely irritate him and also so that he will hold still.  Once everything is clear they will be able to see his ear drum and go ahead and put his tubes in.  Once tubes are in, and fluid is drained they will THEN do the ABR test AGAIN to determine how well or how little he is able to hear.  I know tubes are a pretty routine surgery that everyone tells me is no big deal however he will be only be 7 months and he will be under an hour and a half. With just getting tubes you are in and out in 15 min, but with cleaning and testing him afterwards he will be under a lot longer.  None of my boys have ever had to be put under and so I will admit that this makes me a little nervous. At least we will know whats going on with his hearing finally! So..... July 1st is the big day. Please keep G in your prayers.
Thanks!

5 on Friday

This week has gone by so fast and although it was a stressful one, here our 5 things that I loved about the week.

One

My new favorite breakfast spot downtown Charleston. Although it may not look like very much, breakfast was amazing here!  The kids chocolate chip pancakes were scrumptious and that's saying a lot from a fellow chocolate lover. They also had carrot cake, peaches and cream and a banana chocolate chop pancake. Yum! They had chicken and waffles (a first for me) and all sorts of different flavored French toast. If you go for lunch try the tomato pie. Amazing!

Two

Picnic lunches in the living room. Yes! We are still in our jammies. 

Three

Cookie dough balls! 

Yes, my friends raw cookie dough that you can eat and won't be freaked out about getting salmonella poisoning! And trust me they are so good you will eat the whole batch!  Here is the recipe:

Mix

 1 stick of softened butter

 1/2 cup brown sugar 

 1/4 granulated sugar

 1 tsp vanilla

2tbspoons milk

Then you add 1 and 1/3 cup flour

1/2 tspn of salt

1/2 bag of MINI choc chips (since they aren't melted the regular sized choc chips are just too overwhelming)

Then you form them into balls and either eat them plain or you can chill and dip into whatever your heart desires!

Four

Swim lessons. Zachary started swim lessons this week and hopefully Lukas will start soon too. He of course gives his instructor every excuse in the book as to why he needs to take breaks and why he can't go under the water without his goggles on lol. 

Five

Homemade pizza and garlic knots.

Whenever I make homemade pizza I use the leftover dough to make these super easy garlic knots. You literally tie the dough in a knot, bake them at the same time you are baking the pizza. Once they are out, drizzle melted butter, garlic, salt, and Italian seasoning over them and enjoy!

Friday Favorites

Every Friday I am going to attempt to pick out some of my favorite things that happened the past week or just some of my favorite shots and share them with you all.

So this past week, Gavin started sitting on his own AND rolling from his back to stomach. Yay Gav!

Oh! and he turned 6 months old too!

Cutest little baby shoe I have ever seen (again I am obsessed with baby feet)

Lukas, of course, got into many things this week....

Brown sugar!!!! and Yes! It was all over the place!

My mascara... all over the wall too!

Zachary graduated from preschool and will be starting kindergarten next year :(

so proud!

His teachers <3

Break dancing downtown for the Spoletto Festival was a lot of fun. Lukas did an awesome job and kind of stole the show. 

Check out the real dancers, scoping him out

Get it boy!

Watching his big brother..so sweet!

Beautiful Charleston day, watching the boats

Also, if you didn't know, my friend and I started a business a couple years ago setting up, decorating, and coordinating weddings. If you would like to check out what we do, and some of our other weddings you can click here. 

Here are some photos that I took from the wedding last weekend

Enjoy your weekend!!